As someone who has struggled with panic attacks, I know how agonizing, scary, and frustrating they can be.  And for the person who is with them when it happens, it can feel the same way!  Agonizing to see your friend, family member, or fellow human suffering in this way, and both scary and frustrating because you want to help but aren't sure how.  

Well, today I'm sharing 5 simple steps you can follow to help someone get through a panic attack.  It will help them to feel safe, reassured, and gradually calmer as you guide them through each step. 

As soon as you notice the person is struggling or they've indicated to you that they're in panic, let them know that they're not alone and you're going to be there to help them through it. 

Firstly, resist the urge to placate them- saying things like, "you poor thing" or "it's alright" is not helpful.  Instead, use a reassuring gentle tone and say something like, " You are not alone, I'm right here with you and I'm going to help you through this.  We'll do it together." 

When I am struggling with anxiety, I often use the image of a ladder- the worse my anxiety is, the higher up the ladder I am.  When someone is in a state of panic, they are pretty much at the top of the ladder with their arms flailing about!  Now you're going to help them put their hands firmly back on that ladder and climb back down, one step at a time.  Here's what to do:

1. GET THEM TO A PLACE WHERE THEY FEEL SAFE(R)- You will often have to leave the space that you're in to find a place that is less crowded and relatively more peaceful.  This is the first step toward BREAKING THE PATTERN OF PANIC.  Also, get them to rate their level of anxiety on a 1-10 scale. 
(Hint:  most people having a panic attack will answer "11")  

2.  GET THEM GROUNDED- Walk with the person and get them to SLOW THEIR STEPS and FEEL THE GROUND BENEATH THEIR FEET.  Imagine a ball of light in the Earth beneath their feet connecting them to the Earth.  Ask them to " allow any excess nervous energy you are feeling to drain out through the soles of your feet and into the Earth".  If available, have them remove their shoes and walk barefoot on grass.  Ask them to describe the physical sensations they feel as they walk.  This second step helps them focus more on their PHYSICAL BODY and less in the mind.  

3.  BREATHE DEEPLY AND SLOWLY-   Once they feel more grounded from step 2, go ahead and stop and find a place to sit down.  Now ask them to focus on their breath.  Ask them to place their hands on their belly and breathe into their hands.  Guide them to notice the gentle expansion/contraction of the belly as they breathe.  To allow the belly to soften with each breath.  After several "soft belly" breaths, if needed, you can take it one step further by using 2-to-1 breathing. Basically, any breathing pattern where the exhale is twice as long as the inhale has been scientifically proven to calm the mind and the nervous system.  I suggest using a 4:8 ratio (Inhale for a 4 count, Pause, Exhale for an 8 count).  But if that feels too long then use a 6:3 or  4:2 ratio.  Get it?  :-)

4.  "TELL ME SOMETHING GOOD"- Now that they are feeling grounded and calmer, ask them to tell you about something good in their life.  It could be a person, an event, a hobby or interest, or a personal goal they're working on or have achieved.  Or it could be something coming up in the future.  Ask them how that person/event/activity made/makes them feel?  Help them to connect with something positive in their life to further BREAK THE PANIC PATTERN AND ADJUST THEIR FOCUS TO A RECENT SITUATION WHERE THEY  FELT/FEEL EMPOWERED AND HAPPY. 

5.  CHECK IN- Ask them how they're feeling now compared to when you started.  Rate on a 1-10 scale again.  Revisit any of the above steps if needed- they may have found a particular step helpful.  

Do go through these steps slowly and feel free to spend as much time as needed in any step.  As you go through the steps, continue to reassure them and if needed, remind them to focus only on the task at hand.  " You're doing great", "nice and easy", "feel your feet on the Earth", or "breathe into soft belly" are some examples you can use.  To help with focus,  "nowhere else you need to be, nothing else you need to do", "surrender to the grace of this present moment" are good examples.  

Do you have any helpful strategies that help with panic attacks, either for yourself or using with someone else?  Please share them!  In this way we can all help each other to become better at handling anxiety and panic- and that makes for less panic all around.  :-)

Also if you have any questions for me regarding my experience with anxiety or panic, feel free to reach out!  


COMING UP:  I WILL BE HOSTING A WEBINAR ON MY "HOW TO CALM AN ANXIOUS MIND" PROGRAM!  THIS UNIQUE PROGRAM IS FULL OF STRATEGIES YOU CAN USE EVERYDAY TO HELP YOU FEEL CALMER AND LESS ANXIOUS.  IF YOU'D LIKE TO FIND OUT MORE, SIGN UP FOR MY NEWSLETTER AND I'LL KEEP YOU IN THE LOOP!  CLICK HERE TO GO TO MY HOME PAGE AND SIGN UP.    

Unless you've been living under a rock, you have probably heard something about the "mindfulness" movement.  I like to quip that "mindfulness" is the new "kale".  Suddenly we all need to be more "mindful" as a way to help us feel better.  But why is it the new trend and what does it actually mean to be "mindful"?

Firstly, the internet and technology have enabled us to be more connected than ever before.  This modern technology has also made the world operate at a much faster pace.  It means that we are bombarded with more information/stimulus than in the past.  The more we "plug in" through the internet, social media, and our smart phones, the more difficulty we have with "switching off".  This creates more mental stress and fatigue.  And thus, a greater need for meditation practices such as mindfulness.

Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn is a scientific researcher and creator of the Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction program.  The MBSR program is the most scientifically-studied meditation program on the planet.  Dr. Kabat-Zinn defines mindfulness in this way (and I paraphrase):  "Mindfulness is the practice of paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment and non-judgmentally".  Simple enough, right?  Not so easy.  But cultivating mindfulness is a way that we can feel calmer and less triggered by what happens around us.  

Our work environment is often a major source of stress.  For this reason, I would like to share with you some of my top tips for being more mindful at work.  This is part of what I teach in my "How To Calm An Anxious Mind" program and in working privately with clients.  Putting these into practice can have an amazing positive impact on your experience at work.  They can help you to feel calmer, less reactive, and happier in your work life.  

First, let it be said that I am not a food blogger.  That would require more attention to detail than I can muster when it comes to cooking.  I like to use recipes I find as "templates", preferring to add my own twist and play with ingredients and amounts.  This recipe is no exception.  But, in my defense, I have made this recipe more times than I can count and it is very forgiving.  Something you can throw together that is healthy and I bet your whole family will love. 

I think it is important to use quality ingredients whenever possible.  Especially meats.  Better for your family's health and better for our planet.  So buy organic pasture-raised meats whenever possible.  I also only use San Marzano tomatoes, as I find the flavor far superior to other canned tomatoes.  And buy good quality stock as well.  It really does make a difference in the final flavors of the dish.

Make this for your family and see how it goes down!  Enjoy!

Last week, I got hit with some sort of virus.  A cold-y, flu-y thing.  It was one of those sicknesses that wasn't so bad that I couldn't function, so I thought I would do some "busy resting".  You might be familiar with the idea of what I call "busy resting".  It's when you get run down and you feel bad but not bad enough to be bedridden, so you compromise by spending one morning on the couch working, answering emails, and checking your social media feeds.  Busy resting= refusing to give yourselves permission to rest for fear of getting behind on tasks, commitments, and, well, a fear of resting itself.   

I was guilty of this last week.  I spent a morning in bed to "rest" while I wrote a blog post, checked emails, did some research, and did some internet shopping.  Somewhere in the midst of my "functional resting", I realized that I just needed to completely stop and just lie there, breathe, relax, and BE.  Give myself the space to heal.  So I put away my laptop and notebook.  I lay there quietly and did nothing.  I noticed that it was uncomfortable at first, and my mind was still clinging to all the stuff I "should" be doing.  It didn't want to let it all go, even for a little while.  I took a few deep breaths and allowed all the "shoulds" to rest aside for now.  It could wait.  It would all be done.  At that moment, my health and well being were the priority.  And so, for the next few days, I drank hot teas, took hot baths, and minimized my media time.  I slowed down.  I stretched.  I lay down and rested.  And fully restored.  

We find it so hard to take time to completely unplug and just rest.  There are too many things that need our attention.  Too many distractions.  Instead, we try to "push through", and then we wonder why it takes us 3 weeks until we feel well again.  Next time you get run down or start to feel some sickness threatening, take that rest day.  I mean COMPLETE REST.  Unplug from media, cease connecting with the outside world, and tend to yourself with a carer's heart.  Take the time to check in and let your body tell you what it needs.  It knows.  Trust and heed the innate wisdom of your body.  Especially when you're starting to feel run down or unwell.  Listen in and stay true to that innate wisdom. When you do, you'll find that you will bounce back quicker and stronger.  

And while we're talking about sickness (bleh), I wanted to share with you one of my tricks to fending it off during the cold seasons.  It is an essential oil blend called OnGuard by Doterra.  If you have read my posts before, you know that I am a fan of using top quality essential oils as part of my wellness routine. I should qualify here that I do not run a Doterra business, so I am not wearing my "salesman" hat as I write this. 

OnGuard is something that I find really helps me and my family.  It is a potent blend that is anti-viral, anti-bacterial, and designed to boost the immune system.  We use it throughout the colder months to prevent colds and viruses.  If one of us does happen to get sick, taking OnGuard helps to reduce the severity of it and shortens the time span of whatever sickness we have.  It really works. 

There are a few ways to use it.  Firstly, you can stir 1-2 drops into a glass of water and drink (this is how we use it).  You can also add 10 drops of it to an aromatherapy diffuser to inhale it through the day.  Or make a natural disenfectant by placing a few drops of OnGuard in a spray bottle filled with water.  Spray on kitchen counters and other surfaces to keep clean and germ-free.     

You can get Doterra oils on Amazon or on the Doterra website.  If you use essential oils regularly, it might be worthwhile signing up to be a Doterra Wellness Advocate.  There is a nominal yearly fee and it gets you wholesale pricing.  This is what I do and I find it's worth it.  

And lastly, as we head into the holiday season, remember to take the time to rest and just be.  Even 5 minutes of down time can be a welcome respite from your daily activities.  How can you fit a bit of rest into your day?  

Be Well!  :-)




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Part of my Create Calm Life Model is the regular practice of a morning ritual.  If you don't already have a morning ritual, I highly recommend you create your own.

​The real importance of the morning ritual is that it sets the tone and energy for your day.  It gives you the space to pause, set intentions, and move forward into your day with clarity and grace.  It grounds you into the heart of your own center- your own energy field- so that you can be awake, aware, and effective in all of your activities for that day.

Now, before you dismiss this with, "I don't have time for this", let me show you how you can create your own morning ritual with as little as 5 minutes.  This morning ritual can be adjusted to fit the amount of time you have on any given day.  

​1. Be Physical- if time allows, do some physical activity.  This helps to wake you up and ground you into the present moment.  I often do my exercise later in the day, so I will usually just do 10 squats or a couple of stretches.  But if you normally workout in the morning, go ahead and do that first.
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​2. Release the Dream Space- As you awaken and ready yourself to begin a new day, it is important to release the energy from your dream space.  STANDING FACING EAST, take 5 deep breaths as you affirm, "I now release any energy from my dream space as I welcome this new day."

​3.  Sacred Space- It is important to set your sacred space for each day to align you with your earth and spiritual connections.  It further helps you to access your own inner wisdom and guidance as it unfolds in each moment of your day.  To learn a simple process for setting your sacred space, click here.  While my audio file can be used as a guide, work toward learning the process so you can do it yourself.  

​4.  Meditation/Prayer- After setting your sacred space, take a few moments of silence and breathing.  You may like to use a drop of pure essential oil on your palms and breathe that in several times (I use frankincense or a "morning" blend that wakes me up).  This is the time when I pray for any particular events coming up for that day and hold light for any situations where I need extra support and guidance.  This is also the time for your writing, if you use a journal.

​5.  Affirm & Begin- Lastly, repeat any affirmation(s) you are currently working with.  It might be a Bible verse or a word or phrase that is relevant and supportive for you.  In my practices, there are a series of 10 spiritual laws that I work with.  I am only working with one of these at a time, whichever one I need.  So, for example, I would affirm the one I am working with, "The Steps Must Be Guided From Within", quietly to myself.  Now I am ready to begin my day!  

On busy days, my morning ritual takes between 5-10 minutes.  Sometimes I will only spend a couple of minutes in meditation, other times (say, on weekends or days I am not teaching early) I will spend more time in meditation.  Sometimes I do 30 minutes of exercise as a first step, other days I only do 1 minute.  So you can adjust the steps as it feels right for you. 

​It's that simple!  The morning ritual is an important way to help us be more mindful, calm, effective, and successful in our days.  You can use these 5 easy steps to create your very own morning ritual that works with your life and schedule.  Do you have a morning ritual of your own?  I'd love to hear any practices you have that you find beneficial!  

Want to learn more about how to create a calmer more balanced life?  Sign up for one of my "How To Calm An Anxious Mind" events.  To learn more, click here.  

Be Well!